Post by skylark on Apr 29, 2009 11:42:34 GMT -5
Zero and Lark's Apartment in the Shrine -- Evening
Zero and Lark are in the living room.
Maybe it's because spring is around the corner, but lately it feels like romance is in the air.
Zero watches as Lark leans into Giblet for a kiss. (Which, for the record, he never actually completes.)
Lark: How's that?
Zero: You close your eyes way too early. And you always go in right; you should try going in left -- the girls'll dig that.
Lark: Okay. Fo'shizzle. [to Giblet, sexily] What's up, girl.
Kiyone comes in.
Kiyone: Aw, there's nothing in life that chicken could have done to deserve that.
Zero: What you talking about? My man's single, he's just running drills to keep his stuff sharp. That's all.
Kiyone: Ohhh.
Lark: Also, it would be super fantastic if you never mention this to anyone, ever.
Kiyone smiles.
Zero: Are you crazy? You know she's gonna say something. [laughing] We're talking about Kiyone, here!
Kiyone: So now I'm a gossip?
Zero: Yeah, you're a gossip! You gossip all the time!
Kiyone: Since when?
Zero: Since ever--forever!
Kiyone: To who?
Zero: To everybody!
They continue to argue, but are drowned out by...
It's weird, ever since they got engaged, Zero and Kiyone have been arguing constantly.
Lark: [to Giblet, sexily] You want some corn?
I guess I always hoped that, the longer you're a couple, the easier it got....
Meanwhile....
Roas's Apartment
Ninya is on the couch with the new baby.
Roas slumps onto the couch next to her, shirtless and with a beer, and flicks on the TV.
She grabs the remote and turns it off.
Ninya: No. Noise. And, by the way, the whole world gets it -- you love your body. Now put your damn shirt on; no one's making a calendar, here. Oh, and be a sweetie and get me a juice, will ya? Thanks so much.
He grumbles and gets off the couch, slipping into a Celtics jersey.
Roas: As much as it may seem like it to me, personally, I feel desperately compelled to remind you that we are in fact _not_ in prison. And I am just so not your bitch!
Ninya: Watch your language in front of the baby!
Roas: You're gonna have to trust me on this one: Seeing as you're his mother, he's gonna hear that word early, and he's gonna hear it often. Like...non-stop!
Maybe the truth is that it's easier to be a new couple, because you can't really see what's ahead of you.
Meanwhile....
Solana's Apartment in the Shrine -- Living Room
Kazyr is on the couch. Solana sits beside him.
Solana: Tonight, I think we'll go to the park.
Kazyr: You know, Solana, I would be happy to finally see this 'Merna' you always speak of.
Solana: Yeah...never gonna happen. Park or nothing.
Kazyr: You're terrible.
He stands and follows her out the door, tripping over the coffee table, which causes him extreme but unseen injury.
Kazyr: [out of view] Oh! Oh! Oh, my God! Oh!
Solana: I'll, uh, I'll get a towel to stop the bleeding! :shocked:
In the end, the safest thing for a couple is to find a routine and stick with it.
The Hospital -- Admissions -- The Next Day
Azreal is walking through, with Darrell tagging along behind.
Azreal: Darrell, have you noticed how happy all the minions are lately?
Darrell: I wish I was dead.
Azreal: Yep. People love working here! [to a nurse] Good morning, sweetheart!
Infiniti: Ugh.
A couple nurses pass by Lark, who is standing in the middle of the room.
Honestly, it all makes me glad I'm on my own. I really don't think I'd have it any other---
Lark: Hello, ladies. Just window shopping, or would you like to try something on?
Sae: Uh, aren't you the guy that makes out with chickens?
The two nurses giggle.
Lark: Kiyone...a quick word?
Kiyone rushes out from behind the front desk and escapes into the hall.
He chases after her, and crashes into a passing food cart.
He collapses onto the fallen cart.
Lark: [in pain] Is anybody else a doctor?
~*~
OPENING THEME
~*~
I.C.U. -- Elevator / Nurses' Station
The elevator arrives on the floor, and Roas and Lark step out, heading towards the Station.
Roas: I need you to extubate the young fellow in 304 and start an insulin drip on Mrs. Adler for the third time this month -- God bless diabetics who continue to drink -- oh, and [whistles] Clarabelle! In response to the bestiality rumors circulating about you, I've decided to forgo calling you by the usual girl's name and instead I'm gonna be referring to you by whatever famous bird I can think of. I've gone with "Clarabelle" because, of course, that satisfies the criteria of being both a girl _and_ a bird's name, thus helping you ease into the transition.
Lark: I was just running kissing drills.
Roas: Ohhh! That's completely normal, then!
He sighs sharply and goes off.
Lark looks at Rune at the other side of the desk.
Rune: Don't bring that filth over here.
Zero comes up to Lark
Zero: [whispering] Dude! T.C.W.'s back.
Lark turns to look into the room across the I.C.U.
T.C.W. is a horrible story.
Lark walks towards the room, inside of which a young bluenette woman stands near the bed, her back to the camera.
She was married for three weeks before her husband got in a car accident and became a total vegetable. He's been on life support for the last two years; and since he was transferred to our hospital a month ago, she's visited every Wednesday. Very, very sad.
The touching guitar music turns funky as she turns around. It's Luna.
Oh, yeah, and she's a babe! We call her "Tasty Coma Wife" -- or "T.C.W." for short.
The hot intro halts and reality resumes as Lark enters the room.
Luna: How's he doing?
Lark: You know...he's--he's the same. How are you doing?
Luna: Actually, I was just calculating how much time I need to spend here so I don't feel guilty all week.... And now I need to double it, because I can't believe I just said that.
Lark: I think you're allowed to do whatever you want, Mrs. Noah.
Luna: Please, call me Luna.
Lark: "Luna"?
Luna: Mm-hmm.
Lark: Okay.
Luna: You have something on your cheek.
Lark: What is it?
Luna: Here.
She gets out a tissue and rubs the spot on his cheek.
Lark: Workin' in a hospital...it's always...something.
Luna: Yeah, I get it.
Lark: Oh. Did you get it?
Luna: No, not yet.
***Fantasy Sequence...
She laves his cheek with her tongue, and they begin making out, collapsing across her comatose husband's bed.
****
Azreal and Darrell poke their heads in.
Azreal: How we doin' today?
Lark jumps back, interrupting Luna's work with the tissue.
Lark: Oh! We're excellent, sir. No one going to hell in here!
Azreal: Super!
~*~
Nurses' Station
Zero is following Kiyone.
Zero: Baby. You've always known about my sleep toots. Hell, you used to imitate the sound they made, remember?
He imitates it.
Rune: I make Mr. Lai wear special air-tight boxer shorts.
Zero: Rune, I wrote the guest list for this conversation, and just in case, if you're wondering, you're not on it. Okay? So just [shoos her away] umn-jun-humn. *to Kiyone* And as for you, could you go one day without making a big deal out of everything? One damn day! Woman!
He stalks off.
Roas approaches, with a young boy by the hand.
Roas: Hey, Kiyone, would you be good enough to take this young gentleman back to his room in Pediatrics? Apparently as a form of social protest, he chewed on and subsequently swallowed part of a Rolling Stones CD. [bends down to Jimmy's level] I'll tell you what, there, Little Jimmy: They sold out for good once they started doing Ford commercials, you know what I'm saying?
Little Jimmy: [to Kiyone] Hm?
Kiyone: Mm-mm.
Roas: We--we'll talk later.
He goes.
Kiyone takes Jimmy's hand.
Kiyone: Come on, Jimmy.
He notices her engagement ring.
Little Jimmy: I had that inside of me.
Rune: What, now?
Kiyone: He's just making stuff up. Come on.
Little Jimmy: I swallowed that ring, and my dad had to wait for me to go Number Two. And the soul stelaer doctor gave me ten bucks to keep my mouth shut.
Kiyone gasps and drags Jimmy down the hall.
Rune: [to self] Mm. Good show today.
~*~
Treatment Room
Zero is stitching up Kazyr's leg.
Solana comes in.
Solana: [sympathetic] Ohhhh....
Zero: Solana! You can't put coffee tables in random places. Damn.
Solana: Hm. You told him what happened.
Kazyr: We were bonding.
They knock fists.
Solana: [not happy] Mm...
She takes a bite of the snack in her hand.
Kazyr: What are you eating?
Solana: Turkey jerky. Protein, baby! Go for it.
She proffers the pack.
Kazyr: Uh, no thanks.
Solana: You don't like jerky?
Kazyr: I've never tried jerky.
Zero: You've never tried jerky?
Solana: Well, jerky rocks.
Kazyr: I won't like it.
Solana: You'll love it -- have one bite.
Kazyr: Solana, I've put a lot of thought into this, and I'm gonna have to pass.
Solana: Uh! Oh, so, eight stitches, and now you don't trust me.
Kazyr: Solana!
Solana: [incredulous] And you wanted to go to Merna with me!
She leaves.
Zero: I feel your pain.
~*~
Exam Room
Lark has the bell of his stethoscope at a man's chest.
Luckily, I'm a competent enough doctor that I'm not gonna let myself get distracted thinking about Luna.
Patient: Can you really hear my heart if it--if it isn't in your ears?
Indeed, the ear piece is still just hanging around Lark's neck.
Lark: Did _you_ go to med school?
Patient: No, I...I...I--No, I mean---
Lark: No, you didn't. Thank you.
He surreptitiously tries to stick the farthest ear bud into his ear.
Okay, the problem is that I'm in a rut. I just need someone to go out and get a beer with me.
Solana faces the camera...
Solana: I can't tonight!
She angrily bites a piece of jerky.
Darrell faces the camera...
Darrell: If I have more than one beer, I'll most likely kill myself.
Roas faces the camera...
He does a spit take with his coffee and erupts in laughter.
Kiyone faces the camera...
Kiyone: Can't. You seen Zero?
Azreal faces the camera...
Azreal: [Flips him off] Ppphhhtttt... >_>
Roas faces the camera again...
He's dying with laughter.
Zero faces the camera...
Zero: Sorry, buddy, can't swing it tonight.
Lark: Oh, come on, player, just a few beers! And if we accidentally run into some skanky hos, then so be it!
Luna: I'll go.
Lark turns around with surprise to look at her.
Luna: I totally need to blow off some steam. Plus, the best way to meet skanky hos is to already have a girl with you.
Lark: Not that I need any help.
Zero: Pff! Hell no!
Lark: Heh.
Zero makes motions to Luna behind Lark's back to say that Lark _definitely_ needs help.
Lark looks over his shoulder at Zero, who begins brushing at Lark's scrubs.
Zero: You got something right....
Lark: Oh?
Zero: Yeah, yeah.
Zero makes one more gesture at Luna.
Luna: ^_^;
~*~
Roas's Apartment
Roas comes in. Ninya is on the couch with the baby.
Roas: Oh, my God. I gotta tell you about that day.
Ninya: I can't believe I haven't named him yet. I've been calling him Monkey Face all day -- I think they would tease him at school.
Roas: Seriously, Ninya, I had this one patient---
Ninya: He's got a boodgie the size of a grape in his nose. Would you run back to the hospital and get me one of those suctiony thingies?
Roas: If I'm not back in twenty minutes, I don't want you to worry because it simply means I drove by a prostitute on the way home.
Ninya: Oh, make sure it's a girl.
He whines miserably as he heads back out the door.
~*~
Hospital -- Cafeteria
Kazyr follows Solana to a table, each with a tray.
Kazyr: Please don't do this.
She drops her tray and sits.
Solana: Do what?
Kazyr: The whole drama queen thing.
Solana: The jerky incident is exactly what is wrong with our friendship, Kazyr!
Kazyr: Thank you.
A spit-ball hits Kazyr in the side of the neck.
Kazyr: Ow! Every lunch, someone hits me with a spit-ball.
Across the cafeteria, Lark whistles vaguely and slips his straw back into his breast pocket.
I'm still not sure how I feel about Kazyr and Solana's... 'friendship'...
Lark glances over at the next table. Techno saw what he did.
Uh-oh....
Lark: Nice day, huh?
Techno: You always gotta have something to say, don't ya? Old nosy nelly, always gotta throw his two cents in.
Lark: O...kay, I'm--I'm sorry about the "nice day" thing. How can I make this right?
Techno: What's it, uh, biscuit and gravy day?
Lark: Yeah.
Techno: Just give me one of them biscuits.
Lark picks up one of his biscuits and tosses it to Techno. It bonks him in the face.
Lark: [weakly] I thought you were ready.
~*~
Bar -- That Evening
Lark and Luna sit down at the bar.
Luna: So, how does this whole wing-man thing work?
Lark: Okay, essentially, you have to think of yourself as chum, okay?
Luna: Okay.
Lark: And your job as chum is to lure attractive women closer to the boat.
Mental note: "The Boat" could be a very cool new nickname.
An attractive woman comes near to order a drink.
Luna grabs her attention and points her at Lark
Luna: Hey, baby! Would you like some of this?
Lark: All right. [giggles bashfully]
Luna: Look at that -- mmm.
Lark: No, no, Luna. [giggles] A little--
Luna: Yeah?
Lark: --a little aggressive! [to the woman] Sorry.
The woman goes off.
Luna: [apologetic] Did you like her?
Lark: No, no, no.... Her ass was way too perfect.
They laugh.
Luna: I can't believe I'm actually having fun!
Lark: I'm glad!
Luna: So, "Tasty Coma Wife," huh?
Lark: Oh, yeah, I'm sorry; I've heard some idiots call you that.
Luna: I kinda like it.
Lark: I thought it up.
Luna: Cheers!
They clink bottles and laugh some more.
~*~
??
Kiyone approaches Zero with Little Jimmy in tow.
She holds her ring in Zero's face.
Kiyone: Is this true!?
Zero: Negative, I paid you ten dollars!
Kiyone: This is disgusting!
Zero: Why is it disgusting?
Little Jimmy: Because it was in my butt!
Zero: Jimmy, I'm dead serious: I want you to shut up! And you shut your mouth, now!
Kiyone: Would you wear this!?
Zero: Baby! Please! Look, I've had this steam-cleaned, like, three times! Not only would I
wear it, I'll put it in my mouth.
He does so....and gulps.
Terror gathers on his face.
Kiyone: What?
Little Jimmy: [giggling] It's fun to eat things!
~*~
Parking Lot
Luna drops Lark off.
Roas is on the way to his own car with a box.
Roas: Oh, ho, ho, ho, Cucco! A married woman whose husband is still in a coma? Hoo, hoo! Can't tell you how many happy couples I know who got started just that way.
Lark: Oh, will you relax...we just got a beer. Whatta you got there?
Roas: One hundred free booger suckers -- and you'll say nothing.
Oh, and Skye, please, oh please, keep hanging out with her. Because I'm really gonna enjoy watching this one bite ya right on the ass. And I good & guarantee you -- she will.
He chomps the air and shakes an imaginary object like a slipper as he heads to his car.
People in relationships are always quick to dole out advice, even though they're usually the ones that are messed up.
Kazyr: See ya, Solana.
Whether they're considering breaking up over a Slim Jim...
Treatment Room
Zero lies in the chair as a doctor readies a tube.
...or having their stomach pumped...
Zero: [opening his mouth] Ahhhhhhhh!
Cut to...
Roas's Apartment
Roas empties the box of booger suckers onto the coffee table in front of Ninya with a vague "Ta-daaa!"
...or just desperately trying to get some attention.
Ninya casually selects one of the bulbs and takes care of the baby.
Roas: [disappointed] Oh.
Zero and Lark's Apartment
The doorbell rings.
So, I'm not gonna sweat it just because I made a new friend, you know? I mean, what's the big deal?
Lark answers the door to Luna.
Luna: Hey!
Lark: [shocked] Hey.
Luna: May I come in?
Zero and Lark are in the living room.
Maybe it's because spring is around the corner, but lately it feels like romance is in the air.
Zero watches as Lark leans into Giblet for a kiss. (Which, for the record, he never actually completes.)
Lark: How's that?
Zero: You close your eyes way too early. And you always go in right; you should try going in left -- the girls'll dig that.
Lark: Okay. Fo'shizzle. [to Giblet, sexily] What's up, girl.
Kiyone comes in.
Kiyone: Aw, there's nothing in life that chicken could have done to deserve that.
Zero: What you talking about? My man's single, he's just running drills to keep his stuff sharp. That's all.
Kiyone: Ohhh.
Lark: Also, it would be super fantastic if you never mention this to anyone, ever.
Kiyone smiles.
Zero: Are you crazy? You know she's gonna say something. [laughing] We're talking about Kiyone, here!
Kiyone: So now I'm a gossip?
Zero: Yeah, you're a gossip! You gossip all the time!
Kiyone: Since when?
Zero: Since ever--forever!
Kiyone: To who?
Zero: To everybody!
They continue to argue, but are drowned out by...
It's weird, ever since they got engaged, Zero and Kiyone have been arguing constantly.
Lark: [to Giblet, sexily] You want some corn?
I guess I always hoped that, the longer you're a couple, the easier it got....
Meanwhile....
Roas's Apartment
Ninya is on the couch with the new baby.
Roas slumps onto the couch next to her, shirtless and with a beer, and flicks on the TV.
She grabs the remote and turns it off.
Ninya: No. Noise. And, by the way, the whole world gets it -- you love your body. Now put your damn shirt on; no one's making a calendar, here. Oh, and be a sweetie and get me a juice, will ya? Thanks so much.
He grumbles and gets off the couch, slipping into a Celtics jersey.
Roas: As much as it may seem like it to me, personally, I feel desperately compelled to remind you that we are in fact _not_ in prison. And I am just so not your bitch!
Ninya: Watch your language in front of the baby!
Roas: You're gonna have to trust me on this one: Seeing as you're his mother, he's gonna hear that word early, and he's gonna hear it often. Like...non-stop!
Maybe the truth is that it's easier to be a new couple, because you can't really see what's ahead of you.
Meanwhile....
Solana's Apartment in the Shrine -- Living Room
Kazyr is on the couch. Solana sits beside him.
Solana: Tonight, I think we'll go to the park.
Kazyr: You know, Solana, I would be happy to finally see this 'Merna' you always speak of.
Solana: Yeah...never gonna happen. Park or nothing.
Kazyr: You're terrible.
He stands and follows her out the door, tripping over the coffee table, which causes him extreme but unseen injury.
Kazyr: [out of view] Oh! Oh! Oh, my God! Oh!
Solana: I'll, uh, I'll get a towel to stop the bleeding! :shocked:
In the end, the safest thing for a couple is to find a routine and stick with it.
The Hospital -- Admissions -- The Next Day
Azreal is walking through, with Darrell tagging along behind.
Azreal: Darrell, have you noticed how happy all the minions are lately?
Darrell: I wish I was dead.
Azreal: Yep. People love working here! [to a nurse] Good morning, sweetheart!
Infiniti: Ugh.
A couple nurses pass by Lark, who is standing in the middle of the room.
Honestly, it all makes me glad I'm on my own. I really don't think I'd have it any other---
Lark: Hello, ladies. Just window shopping, or would you like to try something on?
Sae: Uh, aren't you the guy that makes out with chickens?
The two nurses giggle.
Lark: Kiyone...a quick word?
Kiyone rushes out from behind the front desk and escapes into the hall.
He chases after her, and crashes into a passing food cart.
He collapses onto the fallen cart.
Lark: [in pain] Is anybody else a doctor?
~*~
OPENING THEME
~*~
I.C.U. -- Elevator / Nurses' Station
The elevator arrives on the floor, and Roas and Lark step out, heading towards the Station.
Roas: I need you to extubate the young fellow in 304 and start an insulin drip on Mrs. Adler for the third time this month -- God bless diabetics who continue to drink -- oh, and [whistles] Clarabelle! In response to the bestiality rumors circulating about you, I've decided to forgo calling you by the usual girl's name and instead I'm gonna be referring to you by whatever famous bird I can think of. I've gone with "Clarabelle" because, of course, that satisfies the criteria of being both a girl _and_ a bird's name, thus helping you ease into the transition.
Lark: I was just running kissing drills.
Roas: Ohhh! That's completely normal, then!
He sighs sharply and goes off.
Lark looks at Rune at the other side of the desk.
Rune: Don't bring that filth over here.
Zero comes up to Lark
Zero: [whispering] Dude! T.C.W.'s back.
Lark turns to look into the room across the I.C.U.
T.C.W. is a horrible story.
Lark walks towards the room, inside of which a young bluenette woman stands near the bed, her back to the camera.
She was married for three weeks before her husband got in a car accident and became a total vegetable. He's been on life support for the last two years; and since he was transferred to our hospital a month ago, she's visited every Wednesday. Very, very sad.
The touching guitar music turns funky as she turns around. It's Luna.
Oh, yeah, and she's a babe! We call her "Tasty Coma Wife" -- or "T.C.W." for short.
The hot intro halts and reality resumes as Lark enters the room.
Luna: How's he doing?
Lark: You know...he's--he's the same. How are you doing?
Luna: Actually, I was just calculating how much time I need to spend here so I don't feel guilty all week.... And now I need to double it, because I can't believe I just said that.
Lark: I think you're allowed to do whatever you want, Mrs. Noah.
Luna: Please, call me Luna.
Lark: "Luna"?
Luna: Mm-hmm.
Lark: Okay.
Luna: You have something on your cheek.
Lark: What is it?
Luna: Here.
She gets out a tissue and rubs the spot on his cheek.
Lark: Workin' in a hospital...it's always...something.
Luna: Yeah, I get it.
Lark: Oh. Did you get it?
Luna: No, not yet.
***Fantasy Sequence...
She laves his cheek with her tongue, and they begin making out, collapsing across her comatose husband's bed.
****
Azreal and Darrell poke their heads in.
Azreal: How we doin' today?
Lark jumps back, interrupting Luna's work with the tissue.
Lark: Oh! We're excellent, sir. No one going to hell in here!
Azreal: Super!
~*~
Nurses' Station
Zero is following Kiyone.
Zero: Baby. You've always known about my sleep toots. Hell, you used to imitate the sound they made, remember?
He imitates it.
Rune: I make Mr. Lai wear special air-tight boxer shorts.
Zero: Rune, I wrote the guest list for this conversation, and just in case, if you're wondering, you're not on it. Okay? So just [shoos her away] umn-jun-humn. *to Kiyone* And as for you, could you go one day without making a big deal out of everything? One damn day! Woman!
He stalks off.
Roas approaches, with a young boy by the hand.
Roas: Hey, Kiyone, would you be good enough to take this young gentleman back to his room in Pediatrics? Apparently as a form of social protest, he chewed on and subsequently swallowed part of a Rolling Stones CD. [bends down to Jimmy's level] I'll tell you what, there, Little Jimmy: They sold out for good once they started doing Ford commercials, you know what I'm saying?
Little Jimmy: [to Kiyone] Hm?
Kiyone: Mm-mm.
Roas: We--we'll talk later.
He goes.
Kiyone takes Jimmy's hand.
Kiyone: Come on, Jimmy.
He notices her engagement ring.
Little Jimmy: I had that inside of me.
Rune: What, now?
Kiyone: He's just making stuff up. Come on.
Little Jimmy: I swallowed that ring, and my dad had to wait for me to go Number Two. And the soul stelaer doctor gave me ten bucks to keep my mouth shut.
Kiyone gasps and drags Jimmy down the hall.
Rune: [to self] Mm. Good show today.
~*~
Treatment Room
Zero is stitching up Kazyr's leg.
Solana comes in.
Solana: [sympathetic] Ohhhh....
Zero: Solana! You can't put coffee tables in random places. Damn.
Solana: Hm. You told him what happened.
Kazyr: We were bonding.
They knock fists.
Solana: [not happy] Mm...
She takes a bite of the snack in her hand.
Kazyr: What are you eating?
Solana: Turkey jerky. Protein, baby! Go for it.
She proffers the pack.
Kazyr: Uh, no thanks.
Solana: You don't like jerky?
Kazyr: I've never tried jerky.
Zero: You've never tried jerky?
Solana: Well, jerky rocks.
Kazyr: I won't like it.
Solana: You'll love it -- have one bite.
Kazyr: Solana, I've put a lot of thought into this, and I'm gonna have to pass.
Solana: Uh! Oh, so, eight stitches, and now you don't trust me.
Kazyr: Solana!
Solana: [incredulous] And you wanted to go to Merna with me!
She leaves.
Zero: I feel your pain.
~*~
Exam Room
Lark has the bell of his stethoscope at a man's chest.
Luckily, I'm a competent enough doctor that I'm not gonna let myself get distracted thinking about Luna.
Patient: Can you really hear my heart if it--if it isn't in your ears?
Indeed, the ear piece is still just hanging around Lark's neck.
Lark: Did _you_ go to med school?
Patient: No, I...I...I--No, I mean---
Lark: No, you didn't. Thank you.
He surreptitiously tries to stick the farthest ear bud into his ear.
Okay, the problem is that I'm in a rut. I just need someone to go out and get a beer with me.
Solana faces the camera...
Solana: I can't tonight!
She angrily bites a piece of jerky.
Darrell faces the camera...
Darrell: If I have more than one beer, I'll most likely kill myself.
Roas faces the camera...
He does a spit take with his coffee and erupts in laughter.
Kiyone faces the camera...
Kiyone: Can't. You seen Zero?
Azreal faces the camera...
Azreal: [Flips him off] Ppphhhtttt... >_>
Roas faces the camera again...
He's dying with laughter.
Zero faces the camera...
Zero: Sorry, buddy, can't swing it tonight.
Lark: Oh, come on, player, just a few beers! And if we accidentally run into some skanky hos, then so be it!
Luna: I'll go.
Lark turns around with surprise to look at her.
Luna: I totally need to blow off some steam. Plus, the best way to meet skanky hos is to already have a girl with you.
Lark: Not that I need any help.
Zero: Pff! Hell no!
Lark: Heh.
Zero makes motions to Luna behind Lark's back to say that Lark _definitely_ needs help.
Lark looks over his shoulder at Zero, who begins brushing at Lark's scrubs.
Zero: You got something right....
Lark: Oh?
Zero: Yeah, yeah.
Zero makes one more gesture at Luna.
Luna: ^_^;
~*~
Roas's Apartment
Roas comes in. Ninya is on the couch with the baby.
Roas: Oh, my God. I gotta tell you about that day.
Ninya: I can't believe I haven't named him yet. I've been calling him Monkey Face all day -- I think they would tease him at school.
Roas: Seriously, Ninya, I had this one patient---
Ninya: He's got a boodgie the size of a grape in his nose. Would you run back to the hospital and get me one of those suctiony thingies?
Roas: If I'm not back in twenty minutes, I don't want you to worry because it simply means I drove by a prostitute on the way home.
Ninya: Oh, make sure it's a girl.
He whines miserably as he heads back out the door.
~*~
Hospital -- Cafeteria
Kazyr follows Solana to a table, each with a tray.
Kazyr: Please don't do this.
She drops her tray and sits.
Solana: Do what?
Kazyr: The whole drama queen thing.
Solana: The jerky incident is exactly what is wrong with our friendship, Kazyr!
Kazyr: Thank you.
A spit-ball hits Kazyr in the side of the neck.
Kazyr: Ow! Every lunch, someone hits me with a spit-ball.
Across the cafeteria, Lark whistles vaguely and slips his straw back into his breast pocket.
I'm still not sure how I feel about Kazyr and Solana's... 'friendship'...
Lark glances over at the next table. Techno saw what he did.
Uh-oh....
Lark: Nice day, huh?
Techno: You always gotta have something to say, don't ya? Old nosy nelly, always gotta throw his two cents in.
Lark: O...kay, I'm--I'm sorry about the "nice day" thing. How can I make this right?
Techno: What's it, uh, biscuit and gravy day?
Lark: Yeah.
Techno: Just give me one of them biscuits.
Lark picks up one of his biscuits and tosses it to Techno. It bonks him in the face.
Lark: [weakly] I thought you were ready.
~*~
Bar -- That Evening
Lark and Luna sit down at the bar.
Luna: So, how does this whole wing-man thing work?
Lark: Okay, essentially, you have to think of yourself as chum, okay?
Luna: Okay.
Lark: And your job as chum is to lure attractive women closer to the boat.
Mental note: "The Boat" could be a very cool new nickname.
An attractive woman comes near to order a drink.
Luna grabs her attention and points her at Lark
Luna: Hey, baby! Would you like some of this?
Lark: All right. [giggles bashfully]
Luna: Look at that -- mmm.
Lark: No, no, Luna. [giggles] A little--
Luna: Yeah?
Lark: --a little aggressive! [to the woman] Sorry.
The woman goes off.
Luna: [apologetic] Did you like her?
Lark: No, no, no.... Her ass was way too perfect.
They laugh.
Luna: I can't believe I'm actually having fun!
Lark: I'm glad!
Luna: So, "Tasty Coma Wife," huh?
Lark: Oh, yeah, I'm sorry; I've heard some idiots call you that.
Luna: I kinda like it.
Lark: I thought it up.
Luna: Cheers!
They clink bottles and laugh some more.
~*~
??
Kiyone approaches Zero with Little Jimmy in tow.
She holds her ring in Zero's face.
Kiyone: Is this true!?
Zero: Negative, I paid you ten dollars!
Kiyone: This is disgusting!
Zero: Why is it disgusting?
Little Jimmy: Because it was in my butt!
Zero: Jimmy, I'm dead serious: I want you to shut up! And you shut your mouth, now!
Kiyone: Would you wear this!?
Zero: Baby! Please! Look, I've had this steam-cleaned, like, three times! Not only would I
wear it, I'll put it in my mouth.
He does so....and gulps.
Terror gathers on his face.
Kiyone: What?
Little Jimmy: [giggling] It's fun to eat things!
~*~
Parking Lot
Luna drops Lark off.
Roas is on the way to his own car with a box.
Roas: Oh, ho, ho, ho, Cucco! A married woman whose husband is still in a coma? Hoo, hoo! Can't tell you how many happy couples I know who got started just that way.
Lark: Oh, will you relax...we just got a beer. Whatta you got there?
Roas: One hundred free booger suckers -- and you'll say nothing.
Oh, and Skye, please, oh please, keep hanging out with her. Because I'm really gonna enjoy watching this one bite ya right on the ass. And I good & guarantee you -- she will.
He chomps the air and shakes an imaginary object like a slipper as he heads to his car.
People in relationships are always quick to dole out advice, even though they're usually the ones that are messed up.
Kazyr: See ya, Solana.
Whether they're considering breaking up over a Slim Jim...
Treatment Room
Zero lies in the chair as a doctor readies a tube.
...or having their stomach pumped...
Zero: [opening his mouth] Ahhhhhhhh!
Cut to...
Roas's Apartment
Roas empties the box of booger suckers onto the coffee table in front of Ninya with a vague "Ta-daaa!"
...or just desperately trying to get some attention.
Ninya casually selects one of the bulbs and takes care of the baby.
Roas: [disappointed] Oh.
Zero and Lark's Apartment
The doorbell rings.
So, I'm not gonna sweat it just because I made a new friend, you know? I mean, what's the big deal?
Lark answers the door to Luna.
Luna: Hey!
Lark: [shocked] Hey.
Luna: May I come in?
